chastity formula

Thursday, April 17, 2014

Top list of Priests

It is Holy Thursday 2014. It is a sunny day in La Paz, Bolivia and by now most Chrism Mass celebrations are taking place right now. I was reading a post by one of my acquaintances, where he was greeting all GOOD Priests and bluntly criticizing those who need to work on their vocation and minister. 

Honestly I find this disgusting. We are prone to see the splint in our brother's eye, but we never realize the log in ours. More so we say "Do not judge", yet we stone these men who have set a distance between their vocation and the way they act. 

When I was younger I was very much like that. I was very much like that until a year or so. The challenge came with Fr. José María from my local parish. This man found much delight in giving his homily and then collecting applause. The bad point aside from the applause? The fact that his homily was a rhetorical speech about values in our society and almost never he would address what we had listened in scripture. I was literally BORED. Eventually we stopped going there, and would rather take extra 10 to 15 minutes and attend another parish. Some how in one of the other homilies that I was able to listen the challenge came....PRAY FOR HIM!

I know I don't pray that often for him, but to my surprise a Sunday that I was running late I had to attend the celebration he was proceeding. To my surprise and rejoice he was asking people not to clap after his homily. ONE STEP ahead! Fast forward after ash Wednesday I attended a Friday mass again with him. For some months I've been called to kneel for Communion. This time with him, I was denied to receive Communion on my knees. Quite frankly, it almost seemed the priest thought I was kneeling for him!!!!! Gladly God granted me Grace to stop complaining right away and realize how much more prayer and penance he needs.

Once when I was talking to Sr. Martin (my spiritual sister MC), I told her that I had a top list of priests who had lead me to LOVE more and whose teaching is really a treasure. It is really easy to keep them on my prayer all the time. So now I'm trading lists. Well not really trading but expanding it and putting in the first places those priests I know that need more prayer and penance. After all if the #1 has my Bishop, then it is really an emergency for La Paz Archdiocese. 

May God touch their hearts, so they will burn again with the fire of Christ, so that they will again, lay down their lives for the Bride of Christ. 

(BTW, if you want to know who are my top priests, know they include our two Popes, Fr. Cantalamessa, Fr. Muir, Fr. Di Quatro, Fr. Eleuterio, Fr. Lino, Fr. Clements, Fr. Auñion, Fr. Rastislav. God keep blessing them.)

Friday, March 28, 2014

Created by Love to love each other

And this is the way we fulfill our life. Some times we are loved by our parents and family, others by friends and sometimes by our espouse.

It's all part of the training, for we have to learn to love freely, faithfully and fruitfully. Like GS 24 reminds us "This likeness reveals that man, who is the only creature on earth which God willed for itself, cannot fully find himself except through a sincere gift of himself." The whole experience includes lots of comprehension, patience, humility and lots of forgiveness.

My life has been blessed as in this process God has given me the opportunity to love and be loved by a wide variety of people, with different backgrounds, opinions, experiences and much more. Years and years had to pass by so I would understand that it is this diversity the very same reason why life is more rich. Some times, not all works as we wished and we make mistakes. But it is through forgiveness that we may get back in track. Some won't forgive us, but we must learn that life goes on and we got to accept their distance. 

Nevertheless, always create the opportunity to open that bridge with that person. It is healthier as well to get rid of all rancor and recognize our mistakes. After all, humility is a powerful virtue that will bare fruit within time. Don't give up on loving others and let yourself be loved: by God first and then by others who are still sincere. That is the trick.... start living and believing that you are GREATLY LOVED!

Thursday, January 9, 2014

Temptation will always be around

People in social networks love to publish what they have done, do or plan to do. Where they’ve been, are or will go. I used to be one of them, eager to communicate to anybody my actions. This stress to let everybody know what you are doing, thinking or where you are, is a great temptation. Most days a “status update” comes to my mind and immediately I have to clear it from my head. What good is it to spread the world my thoughts, actions or location? What do I want to demonstrate?

As I read what other persons are doing, where they are traveling or how proud they are about something, I feel a great temptation to imitate them. Today I had the wish of what I was doing in my old life, traveling up and down. Then something stopped that longing. I realized that ever since I decided to kneel down my life to God, I’m bound to a different life. Some days it doesn’t seem to be as exiting or fun as my other life. But I can’t deny that in exchange, I’ve received blessings that those other experiences never brought to my life.
Even in my melancholy there is certain beauty, peace and definitely there is hope. These are gifts from a loving Father, who is more generous than I ever realized. I gave up my will and every day I’m learning (with Jesus Christ’s guide) to accept my Father’s will in peace, joy and perseverance, opening my life to the Holy Spirit.  There might not be all those trips and activities my will prepared, but there is for sure new unexpected adventures, same as new persons in my life that allow me to be a spiritual mother or a spiritual sister to them, while learning from their humble life more about the GIFTS GOD has for us, here and now.

Monday, December 23, 2013

Top 5 moments in 2013

Merry Christmas from the Garita MC House!
While closing the year with the MC sisters and the children from the day care center, I was thinking how this year went so fast for me but with really valuable lessons.

This are the top 5:

1. To receive a message in 2 parts, from God through 2 different priests while I was in confession.
2. Realize that the real MISSION is how I let myself be transformed by God. To become a MCL is more about a deeper transformation in me.
3. Number 1 and 2 happened while I was in confession. Therefore, I can only say that I've grown to appreciate the Sacrament of Reconciliation like GOLD (or even more).
4. I can speak about Theology of the Body in a country that needs it. But the talks and material won't be prepared unless I start working on it. Thank GOD for the time. Written material is ready, now move on to presentations and resources.
5. Preparing food bags and presents for others with the MC and at home. There is really more happiness in giving (time, effort, food, gifts) than receiving. Thank you Father for the extra income that I can SHARE with those who need it.

Ready now to let Jesus be BORN again in my heart. May He find a place to be born in your hearts as well.


Monday, December 9, 2013

A LMC postulant

After almost 6 years of discernment, finally I had my chance to start walking and preparing myself to become a Lay Missionary of Charity. For I while I had 3 other women experiencing the initiation part. However, after almost 7 months, I'm the one that remains constant.

Accepting the LMC statutes
Some how I understand that is not that easy for them to make this radical decision and persevere in this process. I had a gap of 6 years to sear, think and finally have the striking punch of God to my heart. During this part of my walk, I will immerse into the statutes of this community: Nature and Mission, the Vows, LMC dialog with God, The Cross (no greater love) and the LMC movement as a community. If I work hard and persevere, next year I would be able to start the novice part. 

The first time Sister Adonay MC, agreed to start the whole process, I was glad and I actually thought I was ready to take my vows next day. But I've come to learn that God has a different time and the 2 year preparation process must have a purpose. 

In these past 10 months, I've realized that I need that time, even when my heart wants to give the final jump right away. But in the same way a baby needs to learn to crawl and then to stand up and give the first steps, I need to learn how to stand up, again and again, regardless if I stumble. For now, I need to learn that God's Love is  persistent and always unconditional. More than learn I have to LIVE IT and BELIEVE IT. 

This part some days is a challenge, and most days is a Grace to live this Love.

Sunday, October 20, 2013

Forgive me Father, I have sinned

El viaje Infinito

Te apartas de Dios porque le tienes miedo?

El día que no eres capaz de reconocer tus faltas, es el día en que el viaje que te aleja del Deseo Infinito inicia. Con cada negación, te sumerges más en un agujero negro que absorbe tu vida. Te desintegras, te desfiguras.

Pero cuando empiezas a reconocerte como pecador, como uno más que le da vinagre y agua al Crucificado, empiezas otro viaje; uno en el que cada vez que caes y reconoces tu falta contra otros/contra ti/contra Dios, entras en un proceso de perdón y purificación. 

La primera vez que quieres confesarte es complejo, descubres lo amargo de ese vinagre en Sus labios y tus manos tiemblan.

Pero El toma tu mano y es capaz de transformar aquel momento en Perdón y Misericordia. Para tu sorpresa, cuando aceptas que pecaste y pides perdón desde el corazón, aquella obscuridad se transforma. Es como si el peso del mundo desapareciera. Eres abrazado y sientes que la Paz de Dios empieza a inundarte. 

Ese viaje es el que te reconstruye y te vuelve a recordar la dignidad y el amor con el que fuiste creado. Eres una criatura magnífica, quebrada por tu soberbia y orgullo, por tu vanidad y tu lujuria; pero eres hecho de nuevo y puro en el Amor eterno de Aquel que se despojó de todo por ti.

Es este viaje que, con su Gracia, te llevará a la Santidad, y más aún, a la Comunión eterna. Ese propósito para el cual fuiste creado, será cumplido; y tu deseo infinito será SACIADO eternamente.

Friday, September 6, 2013

To TASTE God! - Sabiduría de Dios!

In about a month I would be able to step up and start my postulation to become a lay Missionary of Charity. Six months ago I took the first step. In this time I've experienced Joy and also some challenges. 

When you start speaking more about God, Justice and Truth your "friends" will start turning the back to you. In this time I've seen how at least 4 to 5 of what I used to think were good friends left my life. Recently my so called best friend also departed when I told her that our vacation together won't happen as I have some commitments and emergencies with some people of my community and with my parents. If I had chose to be a lone person and schedule my time and money only according to me, the story would be different. 

I could have drowned with these friends walking away. But when you abandon yourself to the perfect Love, there are always rays of light. John 15, 8 "If the world hates you, you must realize that it hated me before it hated you."; this was the verse that has uplifted me all these months. Not only that but gave me strength to keep happy and look life with patience and feel blessed with what is given to me, and also with what is taken away from me.

Even it is not the easiest process, learning this lesson has opened the door for me to focus on my thirst of learning more about this God that loves me and demands more every day. While on a short retreat, there was something that stroke me hard. I've finally understand what is to "taste" God. In Spanish wisdom is translated as sabiduría. This words comes from latin sapientia:

sapientia ae, f sapiens, good taste, good sense, discernment, discretion, prudence, intelligence, forethought

The good taste of knowing God, the never ending mystery! Recently I met again with a man that is very bright when he talks about biotechnology. His intelligence is attractive! Of course there is no point in building more illusions when he is a distant person. But while he was talking, I was thinking: If the intelligence of a man can attract me so much, how much more God's intelligence will keep me attracted an eternity? 

Super WOW!

That is when I realized that the price I'm paying for this Love... is ok! it is almost a bargain. And since He is soooo merciful, He has granted me the gift of new persons in my life, that accept that I'm a crazy one, crazy for Him!